Of course it is, it’s actually on life support.
Yes, marriage has long been regarded as the cornerstone of family and society, as it seemed to be in the early 1970s when Mrs. B and I tied the knot. Over 50 years later, neither of us regret the path we took. But, seriously, did our love really require a certificate? Did we need a ceremony to prove our commitment? Surely, our partnership could have survived without government paperwork…….
Today’s almost unbelievably high divorce rates suggest to me that marriage is not a model that is worth pursuing. What once served as a practical arrangement for survival, property, and lineage is now little more than a cultural habit that maybe we’re too scared to let slip. In a world where women no longer need a husband to secure financial stability, marriage now seems more like a relic of social control.
Look at it this way. Half of all marriages collapse. Would we put up with an appliance in the house that only worked half the time? Of course not, so why do we continue to worship an institution with equally abysmal odds?
The truth is, marriage isn’t about love anymore—it’s about tradition, optics, and paperwork. I believe the future of relationships lies in freedom, adaptability, and authenticity, not in a ritual designed for a society that no longer exists.
Marriage is not about love; it’s just form-filling and red tape. It’s little more than a £40,000 photoshoot. Outdated, overrated, and unnecessary. The only winners are divorce lawyers.
Is marriage outdated?
Well, the first answer is: it depends on the person.
I once read a BBC essay on its international website about how the concept of marriage is changing in the contemporary world, as life expectancy is increasing.
The main idea was that a person’s different periods of life would deal with, respectively, different partners. For instance, the first marriage could occur in their 20s, and the second one might come in their 40s. And, so to speak, the sky is the limit: there can even be a third wave.
I understand that this is just an opinion. However, it probably reflects trends as people get married and then divorce. According to Russian stats, every seven out of ten marriages end in a break-up. These figures may correspond with the BBC article.
My parents lived all their lives together, though they’ve been having problems all the way.
My own marriage is now over, although this outcome is not something I had carefully planned. It happens.
Still, I don’t think that marriage is outdated. The concept is evolving. It is no longer a once-in-a-lifetime story, as it used to be in traditional societies around the world. The contemporary marriage now resembles a long-lasting yet temporary relationship.
Is marriage now outdated?
Around 150 years ago, we lived in a completely different world. The majority of folks lived on small farms and life was hard. Small communities offered few opportunities. In 1875 you could expect to live to about 39.4 years old in the US. You needed a large family to help work the farm. Several strapping teenage boys would change a farmer’s life for the better.
Not so today, children are closer to expensive pets. I can vouch for the expensive part. Then it’s unsurprising that most advanced nations around the world are not producing enough children to maintain their current populations. It’s creating something of a crisis in several countries.
I’m talking about families in an article about marriage for a reason; you may have read that children do better in traditional homes where both mother and father are present. If there is no family, then a major reason for getting married disappears. It is really a family if there is no child? I would argue that being in a committed relationship is not the same thing as being married. Being married doesn’t make you happy, being with the right person does.
While I can’t prove this, being married as the expected path for most people will slowly disappear. I guess at some point in the not-too-distant future, churches and conservative groups will make marriage a big deal. Perhaps the abortion issue of the 2040s. A red-meat cause that’s really not your damn business. If a couple wants to live together, how does that hurt you?
This is just one data point in a much bigger transformation. Many, maybe most old institutions are slowing shriveling. Religion, national identity, and power exercised by local leaders being examples. It’s easy to imagine a world where most people live in generic, western societies. I don’t know if marriage can survive in that world.