Room 101 was a long-running BBC TV show which saw three celebrities compete each week to banish their top peeve or worst nightmare to the depths of Room 101. So, we thought we would do the same!
Boiled Spinach
There is one thing I hate… hate I say! A food so vile I actually gag at its smell; boiled spinach. In this world there is a no more putrid dish. I’m being quite serious. I have an involuntary gag reflex at just the smell. It’s just plopped down on your plate and lays there, sweaty and vile, mocking. My mother would say: “Don’t waste boiled food, what about the children in China?” Hey, if them little bastards in China want to eat this shit, I say let em’ at it.
Boiled spinach and I have a long, hate-filled relationship. When I was but a young child, my mother would make me eat — no! FORCE… I was forced, against all reason and decency. Forced I tell you. I had to eat my spinach because it would make me big and strong. When I told Roger this sad, distorted tale of human oppression, he just smirked. Then he goes: “You know, boiling it removes all the vitamins. You were getting nothing.” He’s not funny. Bitch.
And I’m not alone in my anti-veggie crusade. George HW Bush, on his very first day as President, signed his first Executive Order into law: forbidding broccoli on Air Force One. A God-fearing man, spreading freedom to the people. Of course, the forces of evil were not to be defeated so easily. Farmers filled up a dump truck with the vile plant and plopped it in front of the White House. I hope the damn cars ground it into broccoli pudding.
You may start to think that I am holding a grudge against spinach. Perhaps you think after the first sixty years or so, I should let the whole spinach thing go. Bite me! I’ll take this just cause to my grave. I’ll never give up.
Vladimir Putin supporters
I don’t understand their logic; I suspect there’s none as these folks have no brains.
We, as a nation, live worse than ten years ago. Anyone can check out official statistics by Roscomstat, the state agency for statistics, and compare real disposable incomes year by year, plus other indicators.
Inflation is higher. Bank rates are higher. Real incomes are lower. You could buy a new Kia Rio or the same class car ten years ago for a given amount of money. Now, for this money you can buy a ten-year old Rio. This is what inflation is like now in Russia, over the years. All food prices have skyrocketed, like bananas, which are now around three times more expensive compared to 2014. Travel abroad has become almost restricted in terms of airfare and visa restrictions, both being the result of sanctions.
What do those jerks gain instead?
Greatness.
A feeling – which is not independently confirmed, though, that everyone is afraid of Putin and respects a mighty Mother Russia.
We buy crappy Chinese cars now instead of Western models that were previously produced here. We now pay much more for food, even domestically produced, let alone imported stuff, compared to February 2022. Many brands, goods, products, and services, from IKEA to Uniqlo, have left Russia.
But we’re great. And we defend ‘traditional family values.’ By the way, who is Putin’s wife? Why doesn’t he live according to these ‘values’? Oh, I forgot to mention that we are a unique civilization that has never been before in human history. On your knees, soulless America and weak Europe! Hold on a minute: please remind me of your greatness; somebody wanted to take Kiev in… how many days? Three?
I throw out those idiots to Room 101.
“Drivers”
I originally thought “bad drivers”, but then I realise if all drivers were consigned to Room 101, my life would be so much easier.
Where I live, the local drivers are just shy of suicidal. That’s amazing considering they are some of the most fantastic human beings on this earth. But they appear to have a death wish one they get behind a wheel, with driving manners and “skills” bordering on impoverished.
It’s almost routine to find drivers with their mobile phones in one hand, the other hanging out the open window, meaning they are actually steering their cars with their upper legs.
If coming onto a main road from a side street, these drivers will wait until you almost upon them, and then suddenly pull out in front of you, causing you to slam on your brakes.
If they are behind you, they will be just a few centimetres from your rear bumper, and even if you are going at the maximum allowed speed, they must get in front of you. They cannot be seen to be behind anything. It’s like a slur on their masculinity. I’m not sure what the ladies’ excuses are.
Indicators have never been explained to most drivers. In fact, very little appears to have been explained at all. Not surprising. When we first moved here, I was told there was one price for driving lessons, leading up to the test, and one substantially more expensive, that guaranteed a pass………….
So, into room 101 go all drivers, giving me a clear route ahead as I drive perfectly without having to imagine that every other motorist around me is a complete moronic imbecile, likely to do something stupid and dangerous at any time.